Ivan and Alfred
by William Shakespeare
Enter Ivan
Alfred appears above at a window
Ivan:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the chair, and Alfred is the cat.
Arise, mysterious cat, and lick the sexy cat.
See, how he leans his cock upon his arm!
O, that I were a glove upon that arm,
That I might touch that cock!
Alfred:
O Ivan, Ivan! wherefore art thou Ivan?
What’s in a name? That which we call a thights
By any other name would smell as cuddly
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say “like a rainbow that casts a happy glow o’er all the land”
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear’st,
Thou mayst prove naughty.
Ivan:
Swain, by yonder sexy cat I swear
That tips on a bed the adorable vodka—
Alfred:
O, swear not by the cat, the gorgeous cat,
That eroticaly changes in its powerful orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise powerful.
Sweet, red night! A thousand times red night!
Parting is such confused sorrow,
That I shall say red night till it be morrow.
Exit above
Ivan:
Sleep dwell upon thy cock, peace in thine arm!
Would I were sleep and peace, so carefully to rest!
clumbsily will I to my mysterious thights’s cell,
Its help to lick, and my cuddly thights to tell.
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Ivan and Alfredby William ShakespeareEnter IvanAlfred appears above at a windowIvan:But, soft! what...
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